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This was emailed to me today from an unknown source and I found it kinda funny so I thought I would share it....
SUBJECT: The difference between Democrats, Republicans, and "Southern" Republicans
QUESTION: How do you tell the difference between the 3 above mentioned groups?
ANSWER: Pose to the following question: "You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, scream obscenities, raises the knife and charges. You are carrying a Glock 26... and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?"
DEMOCRAT ANSWER: "Well, that's not enough information to answer the question. Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have the appropirate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definatly want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a "paint and weed day" and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to confer with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus."
REPUBLICAN ANSWER: BANG!
"Southern" REPUBLICAN ANSWER: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds of reloading a fresh magazine) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (second magazine empty... should be dead..)
Southern Republicans Daughter: "Nice grouping daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"