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Special Notice
from Carnival Cruise Lines
NOTICE FROM CARNIVAL CRUISE LINES
Afghanistan Cruise
We at Carnival Cruise Lines didn't forget
that a lot of entertainers had promised
to leave the country
if George W. Bush became President.
With that in mind
We have a Special Offer
for those who still want to keep their promise.
Attention
Would
Alec Baldwin
Rosie O'Donnell
Ed Asner
Whoppi Goldberg
Cher
Phil Donahue
Rob Reiner
Barbara Streisand
Jane Fonda
Pierre Salinger
and anyone else who made that promise,
please dispose of all US assets,
and report to Florida
for the sailing of the Funship Cruise
"Elation"
which has been commissioned
to take you to your new vacation homes
in Afghanistan.
You may opt
at no extra charge
to be dropped off in Somalia or Iraq.
The Florida Supreme Court will sponsor
a Farewell Parade in your honor
through Palm Beach,
Broward,
and Miami-Dade counties
prior to your cruise.
Please pack for an extended stay . . .
at least four more years
Note:
Since you advocate strict gun control
you may not bring any
Staffing your voyage is
Bill Clinton
captain
Al Gore
cruise director
Monica Lewinsky
recreation director
Ted Kennedy
lifeguard/emergency procedures director
Ex-Congressman Gary Condit
as intern coordinator
If you have any questions
about making arrangements for your homes,
friends, and loved ones,
please direct your comments to
Senator Hillary Clinton.
Her village can raise your children
while you're gone,
and she can watch over all your money
and your furnishings
until you return.
Bon Voyage!
Is this a great country or what!
VA